i think an uncomfortable truth is that there is an inherent arrogance one has to overcome after spending too much time alone, which is not so obvious when it’s forced (i.e. through ostracism) because the assumption is that someone who has been ostracized is more likely to lack confidence and thinks poorly of themselves. but then there’s this dance between victimhood and low self-esteem yet also subconsciously believing that your own view or daily decisions are “correct” or “better” because you’ve never had anyone tell you otherwise, because you’ve been alone. and in addition have gotten used to being extremely independent and considering others’ input doesn’t even occur to you. so when others DO provide feedback, it’s almost jarring, like you don’t have a behavioral pathway with which to respond or receive the feedback so you just respond with irritation because your system is confused
Executive dysfunction is so funny and stupid I have to put things like “watch movie I’ve wanted to watch” and “move cup sitting there for two months” on my to do list
Okay, this made me pause and literally write out every letter that ‘fell’ in order (‘oomngouuhhrsrtutpntnue’), then make sure they were all contained in 'turntomushuponthergroun’.
